Out of Bounds
"I feel like people think I'm mean," she said. "Really tough and really mean and really street. I believe that the other girls in the locker room will say 'Serena's really nice.' But Maria Sharapova, who might not talk to anybody, might be perceived by the public as nicer. Why is that? Because I'm black and so I look mean? That's the society we live in. That's life. They say African-Americans have to be twice as good, especially women. I'm perfectly OK with having to be twice as good."
-Serena Williams
Sport was my foundation to acceptance. Believe it or not, it has taken me until now to understand the implications of human language and interactions, my own in particular.
To my white friends, I’d say something like, “I wish I was white.”
To my black friends, I’d say things like, “I don’t sound white. I don’t act white. I am not bougie because of the things I like and the foods I eat. Please don’t tell me I should have been white.”
Throughout my childhood, I didn’t understand the magnitude of the racially harmful expressions made by friends. Each day I grew into a pattern of self-hatred because of the color of my skin. I avoided the sun. I even asked my parents to buy me certain skin products and get Eurocentric hairdos. I constantly felt like I didn’t belong to one group or another. All I could feel was this internal fight to survive the only culture I ever knew in America. Most interesting thing is, I didn’t even know it at the time.
But with sport, it allowed authentic expression. It was nothing more or less than real.
When I suited up for any sporting event, I became free, confident. I could be loud without judgement. I became a leader without hesitation. To accomplish this, my teammates and I strategized to conquer the same goal, winning. Not to mention, this experience challenged cultural stereotypes of being black, loud and too expressive (aka known as a bad attitude in sports), and I was who I wanted to be without judgement of myself.
Not long ago, the best tennis player of all time, Serena Williams, experienced this stereotypical judgement that dismissed her passion, talent and pure will to be great because she could not been seen beyond her race and gender. This judgement also took credibility from another great player, Naomi Osaka. This is the dynamic duo that makes being great harder than one may think if you do not wear the black woman super suit everyday, which is exhaustive.
As race and gender in sport evolves as part of my identity, I realized four things:
Being a black female in sports is quite challenging, exhaustive but rewarding;
Challenging cultural norms builds better character and increases cultural awareness beginning with the people closes to you;
Experiencing sport and adversity with a diverse group of teammates inspires unison within self and those those around you (teammates, parents, coaches, etc.);
Finding your authentic self amplifies confidence and transfers into other areas of life such as personal relationships/friendships, personal development, and success.
As I continue to learn, grow and share my unique experiences with others, I encourage all to challenge the out of bounds pressures by evolving, educating and empowering.